Everyday life for an adult or child with ADHD is very HARD work and the feeling of overwhelmis a well known companion. Life is experienced with huge intensity, and what is felt so strongly is often never shown to others for fear of being misunderstood…again.
Feeling alone on the journey comes easily.
ADHD is a highly individual experience and to give you a peep into what it might contain, here are some descriptions from fellow ADDers:
- “I find it very difficult to verbalize and explain my feelings and would always end up crying and saying sorry – hating myself for being so useless and pathetic – only for the same thing to happen over and over again.”
- “I feel like I am letting everyone down. I forget things. I put things off because I’m so tired. I feel like I have no where to turn because NO ONE understands what this is like. I try. EVERY DAY.”
- “All my life, I have felt insecure, inferior, anxious, false – worried that someone will find out what I really am like. All I ever wanted (even as a child) was to be accepted for who I am, the good and the bad. Others were forever trying to ‘fix’ me, but I did not consider myself broken.”
While trying to make sense of one’s already overwhelming experience of dealing with the demands of daily life, general co-existing conditions like anxiety, depression, OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder), addictions ( to alcohol, drugs, gambling, shopping, food etc.), learning disabilities, sleeping disorders, non-supportive life style, etc., can be adding intensity to the brew.Distressing experiences regarding self acceptance, confidence, employment, finances, relationships, academic performance, self esteem, etc., have a significant impact on every other aspect of one’s life, and on the lives of those close to you.
Be assured that the seemingly disruptive patterns and behaviours of the ADHD individual, are NOT caused by conscious decision, lack of willpower, disciplinary inadequacy or bad parenting.
Some ADDers describe their symptoms as if someone else is having access to the “controller” of their brain and is continually changing the channels. The typical and continual characteristic of asking “why, what, how and when”, has resulted in many marvellous medical, technological, and geographic advances and understanding of the world we all live in!
A major reason for the prejudice and confusion frequently associated with ADHD is its individual and paradoxical nature. In the right context, the ADHD brain is able to focus and engage intensely in areas of high interest AND can sustain it.
For those of us who live a life with ADHD/ADD, this is how it is for us …. never dull, as the ADHD brain is on the constant lookout for what it finds most interesting.